Then and Now – Intimate Apparel

I remember when I was a boy, then a young man and then an adult. All those frilly things were kind of naughty and titillating. The lacy bras and matching panties, the garter belts, bustiers, and all the really lovely sleepwear (ok, go have fun peeling it off your girlfriend wear).

Victoria secret had their show on TV and that was a fantasy land of such things with their unbelievable size 00 underwear models prancing about, and Heidi Klum sporting the $1m dollar bra.

In those days we’d walk through Macy’s or another department store and I’d peek in that department but it was like there was a glass wall that I couldn’t pass. All the thousands of bras all hung up and panties and other naughty bits!

And then things changed in a profound way. Guys can have those fantasies and women cannot. Guys never see the shapewear at the back of the intimates section or think about us buying bathrobes and nighties and jammies back there – those things are just not so sexy.

I was standing behind a guy paying for something at the counter in Macy’s in the intimate’s section, no idea why, and I was looking around while I waited. I had gone in to buy a couple of nighties. I looked around at those racks with the bras that used to fascinate me as a guy and I just sighed. I had had no idea what a pain in the butt garment they are. Difficult to fit correctly, often not comfortable, always the first thing to come off when you get home if at all possible.

In another direction racks of shapewear and I’m asking myself, would I ever really bother doing that, and what would the reason have to be? I’m a bit older, I have fewer to impress in that sort of way. It also isn’t so clear – you can push it around, but you really can’t shrink it.

Garter belts – at least as envisioned in the boudoir pictures for VS are useless things. There aren’t enough straps to make them work properly and the “belt” isn’t durable enough. Bigger is that it would be a huge PITA to deal with all the time. Combine that with skirts that stop a few inches above the knee and really demand hose that goes to the upper thigh and garter belts don’t work in real life. Too bad.

Now? Now it’s just another part of the department store, and not that special. I’m still amazed that it is about half filled with bras, but there are so many kinds, colors and sizes that I understand. I have a few that I should heave out – not that comfortable, but they work ok, and ….

Guys, if you want you girlfriend to wear the fantasy stuff, just realize that it’s for the bedroom, not for walking around it.

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